Thursday, November 11, 2010

baby growing diaries #7

In the third trimester, conversations with strangers about your pregnancy are rather inevitable.  Most of the time, they are generic, kind, and quickly forgotten.  Often, they are annoying and intrusive, causing you to feel the need to punch someone in the face.  But, sometimes, they memorable for altogether different reasons.  The latter happened yesterday.

(Standing at the check-out of the fabric store.)

Cashier:  When are you due?

Me:  middle of January (I like to be mysterious).

Cashier:  Oh, not too long now.  Do you know what you’re having?

Me:  A girl, which is exciting because already have a little boy.

(Note a complete change in cashier’s demeanor)

Cashier:  Oh.  The second pregnancy is not nearly as exciting as the first.

(What the???)

Me:  Well, it is more challenging, because you have another little one to take care of, but that also makes it go faster. So, it’s ok.

Cashier:  Sure, but the first time you are so excited and everything is new, so you don’t really mind all the pain, but the second time, the labor starts and you think… why did I do this again? 

Me:  (slight pause and shrug)  well, the babies are pretty great, so it’s worth it.

Cashier:  (long pause- does she really have to think about that?)  Yeah, I guess it is fun to see the little people.  Good luck.

Le fin.  (The End)

I walked out the door thinking how strange and bizarre.  But honestly, as I write this, I actually feel more sadness for this lady.  Do you get that same feeling for her? 

I mean, I know challenges of pregnancy and the pain of childbirth, but like most people, those things quickly fade into jubilation with the first glimpse of that sweet little love.  I did not get this from our cashier.  I don’t know anything about her, but if I,  in sixty seconds, could notice these  sentiments, there must be a story… and whatever it is, my heart goes out to her today.


30 weeks tomorrow. 



  1. That is exactly what I felt for her. Those type of conversations can leave a person without words because you at some point realize there is sadness so deep that there is nothing that you can say.

  2. Well, I can't say that I can relate to her at all. My second pregnancy was just as exciting as the first and the disappointments in my labor/delivery, I anticipated being different. Instead of having to be induced 2 weeks late, I was 1 1/2 weeks early the second time with a totally natural birth...just like I wanted the first time. So no, second pregnancies aren't much to look forward too!

  3. Stacey, I agree. I didn't think there was anything at all to say to her, but smile.

    AMK- I agree too, I don't feel any disappointment at all, because I already have one child. It's more exciting to think of adding to our family (even though I know it will be more work, but more joy too!)


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